cropped salebarnFairview Sale Barn  Fairview, IL

 

Joke of the Week  --

We appreciate your jokes being emailed!!   Keep them coming!!  Please email to:  debi1948@gmail.com

 

 

Give me the grace to see a joke, 
To get some humor out of life, 
And pass it on to other folk. 


Life is short!

 

 

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown 
Ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for 
Their orders. The man says, "A hamburger, fries 
And a coke," and turns to the ostrich, "What's 
Yours?" "I'll have the same," says the ostrich. 

A short time later the waitress returns with the 
Order. "That will Be $9.40 please" The man 
Reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact 
Change for payment. 


The next day, the man and the ostrich come 
Again and the man says, "A hamburger, fries 
And a coke." 

The ostrich says, "I'll have the same." 

Again the man reaches into his pocket and 
Pays with exact change. 

This becomes routine until the two enter again. 
"The usual?" Asks the waitress. "No, this is 
Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato 
And a salad," says the man. "Same," says the 
Ostrich. Shortly the waitress brings the order 
And says, "That will be $32.62." Once again 
The man pulls the exact change out of his pocket 
And places it on the table. 

The waitress cannot hold back her curiosity any 
Longer. "Excuse me, Sir. How do you manage to 
Always come up with the exact change in your 
Pocket every time?" 

"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was 
Cleaning the attic and Found an old lamp. When 
I rubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me 
Two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had 
To pay for anything, I would just put my hand 
In my pocket and the right amount of money 
Would always be there." 

"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people 
Would ask for a Million Dollars or something, 
But you'll always be as rich as you want for as 
Long as you live!" 

"That's right..Whether it's a gallon of milk or a 
Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there," 
Says the man. 

The waitress asks, "What's with the ostrich?" 

The man sighs, pauses and answers, "My second 
Wish was for a tall chick with a big ass and long 
Legs who agrees with everything I say.."

LA Times Please - Are we this stupid!

Interesting that the LA Times did this report.

The only network we would see this on would be FOX.

All the others are staying away from it.  Whether you are a Democrat or Republican this should be of great interest to you!       

Just One State - be sure and read the last part..try for 3 times..           

This  is only one State....If this doesn't open eyes, nothing will!


From the L. A. Times.            

1.40% of all workers in L.  A.  County (L. A. County has 10.2 million people)
are working for cash and not paying taxes.  This  is because they are predominantly illegal immigrants working without a green card.       
(Donald Trump was right)           

  2. 95% of warrants for murder in Los Angeles are for illegal aliens.      
  3. 75% of people on the most wanted list in Los Angeles are illegal aliens.           

  4.Over 2/3 of all births in Los Angeles County are to illegal alien Mexicans on Medi-Cal, whose births were paid for by tax payers.            

  5.Nearly 35% of all inmates in California detention centers are Mexican nationals here illegally.      


  6.Over 300,000 illegal aliens in Los Angeles County are living in garages.            

  7.The FBI reports half of all gang members in Los Angeles are most likely illegal aliens from south of the border.         

8. Nearly 60% of all occupants of HUD properties are illegal.    

9.  21 radio stations in L. A. are Spanish speaking.            

10. In L.A  County 5.1  million people speak English, 3.9 million speak Spanish.

(There are 10.2 million people in L. A.. County.)       

(All 10 of the above facts were published in the Los Angeles Times) Less  than 2%of illegal aliens are picking our crops, but 29% are on welfare.  Over 70% of the United States' annual population growth (and over 90% of  California, Florida, and New York) results from immigration. 29% of inmates in federal prisons are illegal aliens.   

We  are fools for letting this continue.          

HOW  CAN YOU HELP?                

Send copies of this letter to at least two other people.  100 would be better.

This is only one State...If this doesn't open your eyes nothing will, and you wonderwhy Nancy Pelosi wants them to become voters.


IF YOU DON'T AGREE JUST DELETE--IF YOU DO--PASS IT ON!

WHERE DO WE GET THESE MORONS?            

Windfall Tax on Retirement Income.  Adding a tax to your retirement is simply another way of saying to the American people, you're so darn stupid that we're going to keep doing this  until we drain every cent from you.

Nancy Pelosi wants a Windfall Tax on Retirement Income.  In other words taxwhat you have made by investing toward your retirement.  This woman is a nut case!


Nancy  Pelosi wants to put a Windfall Tax on all stock market profits

(including Retirement 401K funds)

Alas,  it is true -- all to help the 12 Million Illegal Immigrants and other unemployed minorities!         

This  woman is frightening. She quotes...' We need to work toward the goal of equalizing income, (didn't Marx say something like this?), and in our country and at the same time limiting the amount the rich can invest.

When  asked how these new tax dollars would be spent, she replied:  

'We need to raise the standard of living of our poor, unemployed and minorities.

For example, we have an estimated 12 million illegal  immigrants in our country who need our help along with millions of unemployed minorities.  Stock market windfall profits taxes could go a long way to guarantee these people the standard of living they would like to have as 'Americans''. (Read that quote again and again and let it sink in.) 'Lower your retirement; give it to others who have not workedas you have for it.' Send it on to your friends.  I just did!  This Woman is out of her mind!

 

THE UMBRELLA - A TOUCHING STORY 

On a rainy afternoon, a group of protesters were gathered outside the grocery store handing out pamphlets on the evils of America.  I politely declined to take one.

There was an elderly woman behind me and a young (20-ish) female protester offered her a pamphlet, which she politely declined.

The young protester gently put her hand on the old woman's shoulder and in a patronizing voice said, "Don't you care about the children of Iraq?"

The old woman looked up at her and said:

"Honey, my father died in France during World War II, I lost my husband in Korea, and a son in Vietnam.  All three died so a naive, ignorant, self-centered bimbo like you could have the right to stand here and badmouth our country, and if you touch me again, I'll shove this umbrella up your ass and open it."

 

 

 THREE LITTLE BOYS were concerned because they couldn't get anyone to play with them.

They decided it was because they had not been baptized and didn't go to Sunday
school.
 

So they went to the nearest church. But, only the janitor was there.
 

One little boy said, "We need to be baptized because no one will come out and play
with us.  Will  you baptize us?"
  

Sure," said the janitor. 

He took them into the bathroom and dunked their little heads in the toilet bowl,
one at a time. Then he said, "You are now baptized!"
 

 When they got outside, one of them asked, "'What religion do you think we are?"

The oldest one said, "We're not  Kathlick , because they pour the water on you."

"We're not  Babtis , because they dunk all of you in the water." 

"We're not  Methdiss , because they just sprinkle water on you.." 

The littlest one said, "Didn't you smell that water?" 

They all joined in asking, 'Yeah! What do you think that means?'  

"I think it means we're Pisskopailians!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


The IRS sent back the tax return to a US taxpayer because of his answer to one of the questions.  In response to the question, “Do you have anyone dependent on you ?”  The man wrote “8 million illegal immigrants,  4 million crack heads,  6.5 million unemployable scroungers, 120,000 criminals in over 90 prisons, plus 300 idiots in state government, thousands of politicians and an entire group that call themselves ‘senators’.  The IRS stated that the response he gave was unacceptable. His response back to the IRS was, “WHO DID I LEAVE OUT ?”