cropped salebarnFairview Sale Barn  Fairview, IL

 

Joke of the Week  --

Anyone wanting to help keep our "Joke of the Week" more current, please email to:  debi1948@gmail.com

 

 

TODAY IS THE OLDEST YOU'VE EVER BEEN, YET THE YOUNGEST YOU'LL EVER BE, SO ENJOY THIS DAY WHILE IT LASTS.



~Your Kids are becoming you......but your grandchildren are Perfect!

~Going Out is good.. Coming Home is better!

~You Forget names.... But it's OK because other people forgot they Even knew you!!!

~You realize you're never going to be really good at anything.... Especially Golf.

~The things you used to care to do, you no longer care to do, but you really do care that you don't care to do them anymore.

~You sleep better on a lounge chair with the TV blaring than in bed. It's Called "pre-sleep".

~You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF" Switch..

~You tend to use more 4 letter words ... "what?"..."when?"... ???

~Now that you can afford expensive jewelry, it's not safe to wear it anywhere.

~You notice everything they sell in stores is "sleeveless"?!!!

~What used to be freckles are now liver spots.

~Everybody Whispers.

~You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet.... 2 of which you will never wear.

~~~But Old is good in some things: Old songs, Old movies, and best of all, OLD FRIENDS!!


It's Not What You Gather, But What You Scatter That Tells What Kind Of Life You Have Lived

 

I talked to a homeless man this morning and asked him
how he ended up this way.
He said, "Up until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to eat,
my clothes were washed and pressed, I had a roof over my head,
I had TV and Internet, and I went to the gym, the pool, and the library.
I was working on my MBA on-line. I had no bills and no debt. I even
had full medical coverage." 
I felt sorry for him, so I asked, "What happened? Drugs? Alcohol? Divorce?" 
"Oh no, nothing like that," he said. "I was paroled."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 


A wild eyed (and butt ugly) old woman walked into a crowded bar
in downtown Washington, DC waiving an un-holstered pistol and yelled out,
"I have a .45 caliber Colt 1911, with a seven round magazine, plus one in the chamber.
I want to know who's been sleeping with my husband?"
A female voice from the back of the room called out,
"You Need More Ammo Hillary!"